小鸡过马路
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送交者: dancewithwolf 于 2008-10-03, 13:30:00:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a
change! The chicken wanted change!
JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
recognized the needs to engage in cooperation and
dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.
HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little
chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to
ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the
chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about
me.
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We
just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The
chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
Mission accomplished!
DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is
your definition of chicken?
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am
now against it! It was the wrong road to cross,
and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it
now, and will remain against it.
AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black
chickens.
DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't
realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the
road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road.
What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not
taking on his current problems before adding new problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which
is why he wants to cross this road so bad.
So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take
falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this
chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live
his life like the rest of the chickens.
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken,
but we have not yet been allowed to have access tothe other side of
the road.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You
can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.
PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my
eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave
me any insider information.
DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.
JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the
plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other
side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that
chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all
chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media
whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the
other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as
plain and as simple as that.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
enough.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will
be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time,
the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of
molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the
road.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
together, in peace.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important
documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an
integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much
more stable and will never cra?#@&&^(C%........ .reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
所有跟贴:
- 炎阳:党妈要小鸡过马路,小鸡敢不过吗? (无内容) - yell (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 19:47:15 (264309)
- This is gender discrimination. why is it a chicken, not a cock? (无内容) - queue (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 19:04:52 (264296)
- Sarah Palin: Johan McCain has been a mavericks for all these years. (无内容) - steven (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:44:51 (264289)
- CCTV: 这鸡要经过一千一百多道检查才能过马路。 (无内容) - steven (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:35:52 (264287)
- xinku: 那些过马路的鸡都应该自杀谢罪 (无内容) - steven (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:32:16 (264286)
- LB: 小鸡不过马路办不成大事 (无内容) - xysreader2008 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:29:45 (264284)
- 法姑:一言不发,对准那鸡就一狼牙棒。 (无内容) - steven (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:28:20 (264282)
- DXP: 不管白鸡, 黑鸡,能过马路就是好鸡。 (无内容) - xysreader2008 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 18:26:40 (264281)
- Yush: 内外勾结的“中央国家鸡冠特供”骗子 (无内容) - JJZ (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 17:48:32 (264265)
- 插一腿:鸡不可失 (无内容) - steven (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 17:26:13 (264255)
- VOLTES: 中國神鸡直播影片造假! (无内容) - JJZ (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 17:09:17 (264251)
- BLUESEA:我爸做的鸡汤最好吃了,如果你们来上海,一定要来尝尝。 (无内容) - 一个人 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 16:41:59 (264246)
- 粪青: 鸡过了马路,鸡就独立了! (无内容) - JJZ (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 16:36:10 (264242)
- 昏昏: 最好等几天等鸡过了马路赶快有时间把鸡全换成鸡蛋然后等一通过再卖出去 (无内容) - JJZ (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 16:27:17 (264238)
- BLT:小鸡过马路是是邓小人以及中土知识分子最后的疯狂。 (无内容) - 一个人 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 16:19:56 (264236)
- STEVEN:真好。正来。 (无内容) - 一个人 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 16:17:07 (264235)
- 中土教授们:小鸡是被方舟子迫害的没有办法才过马路的。 (无内容) - yell (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 15:30:09 (264219)
- 老中一号:存米披索还不如养小鸡。如果粮食危机了,有鸡的就能当上奴隶主了。 (无内容) - yell (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 15:19:36 (264213)
- Enlighten: 小鸡过马路, 今天准备卖, 见好就收。 (无内容) - JJZ (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 15:05:21 (264207)
- Shine: 什么时候我家儿子也能自己过马路呀 (无内容) - yell (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 14:59:48 (264203)
- Amsel: 小鸡过马路因为马路对面就是底特律 (无内容) - Enlighten (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 14:33:18 (264194)
- Amsel: 小鸡过了马路,谁来养活这边的老鸡? (无内容) - dancewithwolf (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 14:17:49 (264181)
- 鸡过马路是因为对面有嫖客。 (无内容) - chouqilozi (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:59:11 (264177)
- 校长:小鸡到马路对面去吃炖鹿肉。 (无内容) - Scratch (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:57:20 (264174)
- HunHunSheng: 根据Dr. Hatoyama 的理论,小鸡不过马路,天诛地灭。 (无内容) - Scratch (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:51:53 (264170)
- 五毛党:小鸡过马路是为了可以吃三包方便面还多五分 (无内容) - 社精办 (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:48:57 (264166)
- Enlighten: 小鸡过马路不说明问题,要看其他动物是否也过马路 (无内容) - HunHunSheng (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:42:44 (264164)
- 方舟子:小鸡为什么过马路?这个问题看起来无聊,其实有很多的科学道理 (无内容) - HunHunSheng (0 bytes) 2008-10-03, 13:36:17 (264162)
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