"America needs change. I will change it! America needs hope! I have hope! I have hope and will change things! Change is what I am going to do! And with hope you can do anything! Like change things! Things that need to be changed! Like those things here in America that need to be changed! And I will change them! With hope things will change! Change starts here but it won't end here, for the future will be changed by our hope! Changed in a way that people will see that the change is better due to the hope we all possess here today. I know change, you know change, we will bring change to the White House with the help of your hope! Things will change!"

(Ladies faint in the crowd. Elite college professors nod approvingly while making sure they don't spill their lattes. Indoctrinated supporters cheer even though they don't realize what's going on.)

"The people have shown that they desire change. Their voices have resounded in unison, merging together their hope for a better future. This hope shall not go unanswered, the world unchanged. Change is coming. When I win the Democratic nomination, when I win the Presidency, I shall change things for the better. Because if there is one thing I know that needs to be done, it's change. I promise you that your hope shall not go unrewarded. Your hope in me shall be rewarded with change! Thank you all for your hope. I promise that, when I enter the White House, things will change. Go-whoa, almost said the G-word there. Uh...change America!"

I'm Barack Hussein Obama and I approve this message.