> Dear Tech Support,
>>
>>
>> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
>> distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the
>> flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
>> Boyfriend 5.0.
>>
>> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
>> such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed
>> undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0,  NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
>> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
>> the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but
>> to no avail.
>>
>> What can I do?
>>
>> Signed,
>> Desperate
>>
>>
>>
>>  DEAR DESPERATE,
>>
>> First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
>> Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
>>
>> Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download
>> Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that
>> application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically
>> run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
>>
>>
>> But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
>> to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please
>> note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the
>> Snoring Loudly Beta.
>>
>> Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus  in
>> the background that will eventually seize control of all your system
>> resources.)
>>
>> Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
>> unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
>>
>>
>> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
>> memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
>> buying additional software to improve memory and performance.  We
>> recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
>>
>> Good Luck,
>> Tech Support
>