princess and all kind of metal music


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送交者: tom_cat 于 2007-07-03, 08:47:42:

各色金属党
场景:一个美丽的公主被困在一个由一条龙把守的城堡里,下面是 同流派的金属党们充当骑士之后的故事结局

power metal:男主角骑了一个独角兽赶过来,逃过了怪龙,救下公主然后在一片魔法森林中同她做爱。

thrash metal:男主角到来,干掉了龙,救了公主然后干了她。

death metal:男主角到来,杀掉怪龙,强奸了公主,杀掉她然后离开。

heavy metal:骑摩托车来的,杀掉怪龙,喝了点啤酒然后同样fuck掉公主。

folk metal:男主角带了一大堆朋友过来,演奏着手风琴,小提琴,双簧管和一大堆诡异的乐器,怪物睡着了。然后这帮家伙扔下了公主,走了。

viking metal:坐船来的,用它无敌的斧子砍死了大龙,扒皮食之,然后公主被强暴致死,骑士走之前还顺走了她的所有东西并且烧掉了城堡。

glam metal:主角到了,大龙一看他的行头笑惨了于是赶紧放他进去,结果这家伙偷了公主的化妆品要把城堡涂成粉色。

nu metal:开honda civic来的,刚要跟大龙搏斗不巧裤子太松被火龙给点着了,结果被烧死。

black metal:骑士半夜来的,杀掉龙并把他钉在城堡前,然后同公主肛交,在杀她之前习惯性的喝了她的血,然后把她钉在了龙旁边。

doom metal:骑士来了,打量了一下龙的尺寸料想自己肯定打不过它了,郁闷至极于是自杀,龙用公主当甜品吃掉了骑士的尸体。又是一个的悲剧。。。

gore metal:男主角来了,杀掉了龙然后把他的肠子展开在城堡前,fuck了公主之后杀掉她,然后奸尸,剖腹吃掉了她的肠子,再第三次奸尸,然后烧掉僵硬的尸体,走之前又最后干了一遍。。。。

progressive metal:骑士带着吉他来的,演奏了一曲26分钟的solo。龙实在受不了了只好自杀,骑士于是跑进公主的卧室,用尽了去年刚在音乐学院里学到的所有技巧和调式又来了一段solo,公主也受不了了,直接逃掉找重金属去...

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This is the situation: There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castle guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the story with different kind of metalheads as knights.

* POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

* THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and f**ks her.

* HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and f**ks the princess.

* FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird
instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.

* VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it,
rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.

* DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, f**ks the princess and kills her, then leaves.

* BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he
sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.

* GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, f**ks the princess and kills her. Then he f**ks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he f**ks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and f**ks it for the last time.

* DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets
depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.

* PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of
boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.

* GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the
princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.

* NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.




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